Daddy: Sam, I have some questions for you. How do you like having your little brother, Josh?
Sam: It’s good.
Daddy: Has it been easy or has it been hard?
Sam: Hard.
Daddy: What do you like about having a little brother?
Sam: I can play with him!
Daddy: What do you not like?
Sam: Mommy breastfeeding Josh.

Sam has been playing all week that Mimi is misbehaving. Her punishment is getting put in the bathroom. This time it may have gone too far.
Sam: I put Mimi in the bathroom. And I bit her.
Mommy: You bit her?
Sam: Yeah, I bit her. I yummed her all up. She’s in my belly. She’s all gone. I ate her for breakfast!

Sam: I can’t make too much words, Mommy.
Mommy: You can’t make too many words?
Sam: No. I can’t make too much words because I’m dead.
Mommy: You’re dead?
Sam: I’m a dead honey bee. I can play with cars and trains and toys. But I can’t make too much words. Because I’m dead.

Daddy is lying in Sam’s room holding Josh a couple hours after he was born. Sam gets out of bed and comes over carrying his blanket.
Sam: Daddy, I’m just giving Josh my blanket because he might be cold.

Sam (2.5): Is there anything you need?
Mom: I need my water.
Sam: I’ll check to see if it needs filling. Oh it does. (Goes to fill water) Here you go cutie pie.

Side note, this was the night before Josh was born.

Sam’s first afternoon with the new quiet time rule. He’s sucking on his monkey binkies sitting in a box on the bed.

Sam (2.5): (crying) The monkey poked me in the eye! And he didn’t say sorry!

While walking back from the dog run
Sam (2.5): My room is messy.
Dad: Oh. Should we clean it up when we get home?
Sam: No.
Dad: No?
Sam: No, it’s pretty cool.
Dad: Oh, pretty cool, huh? Is that what the kids are doing these days?
Sam: Yeah, that’s what the kids are doing. It’s pretty cool.